To Blog or not to Blog

by Molly Moore

“And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”
~ Sylvia Plath

Self doubt is indeed the enemy of creativity and it was that which held me back for many years until one day I plucked up the courage to start a blog and everything changed. Not that is removed my self doubt, although it has waned over the years but it still rears it’s ugly head from time to time but the blog gave me purpose and disciplined me to actually fucking do it. It is why I called it Molly’s Daily Kiss as I wrongly thought that by doing so it would force me to write something every day. It quickly because obvious that was not the case but the name still works for me because no matter when you come here there will always be a kiss for you to enjoy.

I have always been a writer. As a little girl I used to write stories although my overriding passion above writing them was reading them. Every week my Mother would take me to the library or bookshop (if she could afford it) and I would pick out the books I wanted and sit on the floor in the corner until she was ready to leave, consuming them whilst also dreaming of one day being a writer. But with age came self doubt. Huge overwhelming self doubt that was made worse by teachers and by the time I left school that dream had been well and truly crushed. I genuinely believed I wasn’t able to write or be creative in any other form either. I couldn’t sew or draw or paint.

I pursued other courses, none of which really made me happy but I felt capable of doing them and then I became a Mother and was lucky enough to be in a position to not go back to work. Oddly I think my rediscovery of my creative self probably started then in many ways. I spend hours with my kids, making play dough, painting, baking, building, crafting in all sorts of ways and it was around this time when we got our first home computer and I started writing stories again. Stories that made my heart race and my cunt throb. Stories for me.

Of course self doubt still loomed large and so I never shared them. I wrote them for me and stored them away until one day my internet activities lead me to a site called The Lusty Library. I set about consuming vasts amount of filthy stories there which only led me to write even more and eventually pluck up the courage to send one in to be published on my site. To my surprise it got selected as story of the week and later that month story of the month. I was truly floored by that but also inspired.

Gradually though I found the process of publishing stuff there not very satisfying and as I was now a dedicated reader of a number of sex blogs I thought why the hell not. By then I was newly single and enjoying exploring my sexual self. I went onto Wordpress made my name and as the saying goes the rest is history.

I am about to start my 10th year of writing this blog and to be absolutely honest with you I can’t imagine my life without it. It feels in some way like my companion in my journey through life now. It is the place I express myself creatively both with words and pictures and it was having this blog that got me reaching for a camera and discovering that my art teacher was wrong when they said I wasn’t an arty person. I am, I just needed someone to give me a camera to be arty with. It is one of the reasons why I still maintain today that Art in school is flawed. There is no real opportunity for kids to explore other art forms. It is all about drawing and painting and creating boards of work, there is no opportunity to do anything different and as a result so many kids walk away from school believing, like me they were crap at art and not a creative person. But I digress…

I am hugely proud of my body of work here. It is where I have truly found and flexed my creative self and I know that I am not close to done yet. If anything I feel like I am only really just getting started and coming into my own. I know I am good at what I do but I also know there is always more to learn both about creating and about me. This space has evolved with me over the years and I plan for that to remain the case into the foreseeable future. Even if my life completely changed for some reason and I gave up other projects this one is more than a project this one is a core part of who I am. It is not only where I express myself but it is also a place where I learn and think and evolve and grow. It is a space that has bought me amazing friendships and relationships and an ability to make income that I never dreamt would be possible.

In the Food for Thought prompt Floss asked

What I want to know is why? Why do we let the words fall out of us? Would we write regardless of having a blog? If so what is is that draws us into blogging?

And the answers are

Because I love it and it feeds something really fundamental in me as a person.

The words, and in my case also the pictures, fall out of me because I don’t know how not to let them any more.

Yes, see above

It feeds my creative soul and 10 years on I am as excited to publish a blog post now as I was the very first time I ever did, in fact, maybe even more so. *pushes publish button with a happy sigh

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Lexy August 28, 2019 - 7:00 pm

This is so strong and powerful – inspiring – and I enjoyed learning more of your background too. Well told. I love what you do here – both words and photos, and the sense of community you create – and I look forward to things to come.

Marie Rebelle August 28, 2019 - 7:11 pm

And you know what, Molly? I am SO happy you started blogging, and that you have this space, because without it I don’t think we would ever have met, and we would never have become friends. Keep on doing what you do, my friends, using this space to express yourself in all those different ways 🙂

Rebel xox

J. Lynn August 28, 2019 - 7:38 pm

This was a beautiful post to read. Your blog was one of the first I discovered. You have brought forth the quote “dare to dream” and I have and still do, so thank you Molly! ❤️

missy August 28, 2019 - 8:53 pm

It is really interesting finding out more about the background to your writing. I am so pleased that you started blogging and really enjoy reading what you write 😊

elliott August 28, 2019 - 10:41 pm

Without you I would probably not be writing a sex blog, Molly. Love your image, btw, I would hang it in my living room.

Annie Savoy August 29, 2019 - 12:38 am

You had a teacher tell you that you lacked creativity and talent? That is outrageous and a complete travesty. I’m so glad you didn’t listen. Your photos are an eternal inspiration to me and the one in this post is positively dreamy and sensual and so clever. You inspire me always… and I know I speak for hundreds and probably thousands who will never leave a comment here.

Floss August 29, 2019 - 6:52 am

It’s strange I’d never considered how I became more creative once I became a mum, but doing things with the little one definitely does encourage creativity. Although he tells me off a lot because I am messy and he can use paints and stuff without getting any on him! Which in my opinion is completely against nature when you are seven, lol!

As for this line … ‘The words, and in my case also the pictures, fall out of me because I don’t know how not to let them any more.’ This! I totally get this, more so recently since I adopted a slightly different outlook on my creative endeavours.

Thank you so much for sharing for this week’s F4TFriday. Floss x

Victoria Blisse August 29, 2019 - 9:11 am

I love your blog and your words, Molly. You are an integral part of what has made me me. I know what you mean about self doubt. I so often write something and ummm and ahhh about posting it. Weirdly, those are nearly always the blogs that really talk to people too!

Keep on keeping on, your creativity feeds the community. 🙂

Jupiter Grant August 29, 2019 - 1:04 pm

This is such an inspiring post. I was following you on twitter for many months before I started blogging, and I was always inspired by your wonderful images and lovely words. And yes, your teacher was absolutely wrong. Your artistry is magnificent 💖

May More August 29, 2019 - 6:16 pm

Oh my goodness you are so right to be proud of all your posts over the last 10 years. You have done an amazing job of keeping things very real and continually creating excellent content – be it images, stories or non-fiction.
Your blog is awesome – something to shout about for sure x
PS.great to see u on F4t again;-)

Sweetgirl August 29, 2019 - 7:55 pm

I read avidly as a child. I would get 10 books a week from the library, which by the time I was 8 we lived across the road from! I spent hours in there reading too.

Kurvy August 29, 2019 - 9:21 pm

I must say, it is amazing to see those that I see as so strong and confident have similar self-doubt as I do. I see it so many times and it is good. It shows that we are all human and have those moments. You always have powerful experiences and words to share! And yes, your photos are a wonderful creative part of you 🙂 xx

Cara Thereon September 8, 2019 - 1:07 am

It is insane how much blogging becomes a part of you. It becomes a part of your identity and not blogging/writing can signal things are off ( for me at least). I’m so glad your voice is here and strong in the community. You’re so important!

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Marie Louise December 20, 2019 - 9:57 am

Self doubt and writing is so relatable. It’s when you are overcome with anxiety and don’t write at all, or when you read back some of your words and feel like it’s terrible that it’s at its worst for me. It’s what made editing anything really hard a few years ago, but now I think it’s fun to attempt to perfect language and seeing a piece develop.

I’m so glad that you managed to overcome (to some extend) your self doubt and got the courage to start up this blog. I can’t believe it’s been 10 years?! You put everything in those post so clearly across. It’s what makes it so relatable.

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